The truth about domestic violence

There are a lot of myths about domestic violence and the women who experience violence and abuse from a partner. Here is the truth:

· Domestic violence includes physical, emotional and sexual abuse.
· Domestic violence is totally unacceptable. Every woman has the right to live her life free of violence, abuse, intimidation and fear.
· Domestic violence is very common. One woman in four experiences domestic violence at some point in her life. It occurs across all cultures, ages, ethnic groups and social classes.
· Domestic violence is very dangerous. Each week in the UK, two women are killed by a partner or ex-partner.
· Domestic violence is not just about individual men abusing individual women. It is also about the systematic abuse and oppression of women in the society in which we live.
· Domestic violence is about power and control. Abusive, violent and sexually abusive behaviour is wide-ranging and subtle in what it tries to achieve.
· Domestic violence is intentional and instrumental behaviour. It is about scaring you into doing something that you don't want to do or out of doing something that you do want to do.
· The abuser is 100% responsible for his abuse. His abuse is his problem and his responsibility.
· It is not your fault. No woman ‘asks for it' or deserves to be abused, regardless of what she says or does.
· Abusive men can change. His behaviour is within his control and he can choose to stop.
· You can't change him. He is the only person who can stop his own violence and abuse.
· He may change a bit. Some men change a bit, maybe becoming less violent, but remaining abusive and intimidating. You can decide for yourself whether he has changed enough.
· You don't have to put up with it. Every woman has the right to safety and respect, to live a life free from violence and abuse. You have the right to put your own and your children's needs first.