For men: I have been violent or abusive and I need help
'Sometimes when we argue and I shout at my partner she is scared of me'
'I slapped her once and I promised myself it would never happen again - but I hit her again...'
'I get angry with her and I totally lose it...'
Do you recognise yourself in any of that? Are you concerned that your behaviour towards your partner is costing you your relationship? Are you worried your children are witnessing too many arguments between their parents?
First of all, we know it can be tough facing up to difficult problems.
We want to support you to make the changes you need, so that you are
safe around your partner and children (if you have them)
In the following pages, we have included information about domestic
violence and abuse. We encourage you to think hard and face up honestly
to the things you have done. You might have done some things only once
or twice, but in many cases you’ll notice that there is a pattern to
the abusive things you do. By making yourself more aware of your
abusive behaviours it will become easier to make changes and stop.
However, changing abusive behaviours is a long and difficult process.
This website can go as far as making you aware of some aspects of the
problem. It is not designed as an alternative to a specialist behaviour-change groupwork
programme. We encourage you to get in touch with your local project so
that you can get some support. Even if such a programme is not
available in your local area it is still your responsibility to own up
to your abuse and try to change. We offer some ideas about things you
can do, so carry on reading!
